Whyyyy!@#!

Mother CIBAI. I can't seem to get him out of my head.

Fuck it that I see him everywhere I turn.

Stupid infatuation, go away already,

I don't need you here.

Ian.

Heaven's to Murgatroid!

I know I know, I haven't been posting as frequent as I had to. But either way, i'll make up for lot time by posting now. Cause I'm just that awesome.

If some of you haven't heard, I went to the Jon McLaughlin Concert a few weeks back, he's one of my top 4 singers. He's pretty awesome.

This is Gabby, apparently her full name's so long you won't even believe it. She didn't really bother to tell me her full name. She's Benjamin Goering's current girlfriend. A few posts back when I introduced Ben, she told me to make the "current" clear :P

She's a pretty cool girl, and really nice. I hang out in the room most of the time because i'm so jobless. Hm, there's really nothing much I can add here O_O Weirdly enough.

This is Erika. She lives in the same room as Gabby, 606, i think.

You should've seen her hand a few weeks ago, it was badass. Ben and friends went on a skating trip awhile back, and a freak skating accident happened where Erika's palm, more toward the thumb side, got sliced. She had to get stiches and it was really, really scary. :D

Jon McL concert at the bottleneck.

The bottleneck hosts alot of bands like every week or something. I'm not too sure about it, it's a Bar regularly, but it turns into a dance club on Thursdays, Neon. I've been to Neon once, it's pretty nice. Sadly, you have to be 21 to drink though, and that really really sucks. You have to be 18 to get in, so I had to borrow someone's ID to get in. It REALLY sucks not to have a real 18 ID, you can't get into most clubs.

Jon McLaughlin was Uber amazing. And he was like, a meter away. His voice was even better than the recordings, as cliche as it maybe. Me and Gabby went wild over how Good he was. Gabby even purchased his songs online! He and his band did like 10 songs, I think. One of the songs that he sang really got to me. Piano Man by Billy Joel. Apparently he says it's the song that inspired him to do Music. I can very well see why. It is an Amazing Song.

Either way, we got done and headed to the hookah house, as the day ended. I'm thankful I had friends that bothered accompanying me for this. :)

ONLY 3 more to go :D

Jason Mraz
John Mayer
James Morrsion

The picture taken while waiting outside budig that night. For someone.

Here's the comprehensive story, if you bother to listen to it. I couldn't stand it anymore, I had to know. I walked in the cold that night, and waited outside budig, this building like a mile or two away. I sat outside for 2 hours approximately, and waited patiently. But to avail, I got rejected. Bloody mixed signals, it's very very frustrating. I got a call every night for like a week and a half, and I haven't gotten a call since then.

I've been obssesed with card throwing lately, and I don't know why. The card you see here is a memoir from a class trip I had back in Malaysia. I remember getting this at the Genting Highlands Arcade (Theme park.) It's broken. Ironic, Broken Memories.

It started with regular poker cards, and when I realized I could actually do more damage with a hard plastic card, I started throwing it at a wall, repeatedly, and this is the result. Since then, I've been looking for hard plastic cards to keep as extras to just throw around for fun. I know I'm lame! So don't tell me that. I kinda even took some "point cards" from subway just so I could throw em'. :D I'm so retarded.

Oh, the card above was actually the things that killed the 2 hours the othernight. Hence, the brokeness.



Oh! This is bloody cool. Someone got an XBox + Guitar Hero Band Kit from Someone for Valentine's day. IT WAS AMAZING D: I feel so jealous now :D.

Either way, It's a weird thing that Guitar Hero is so amazingly popular here. It's like the game EVERYBODY plays. Well, that and WoW. The sheer numbers astound me sometimes.


Look what I found the Other day! I forgot I brought it from Malaysia, ain't it just bloody cute!? :D

Anyway, Life's been really stressful lately, and I think it's all in my mind. No idea why I haven't really been going out and doing anything this week. I feel bad for always sticking to Ben and friends like glue, I feel like I'm intruding and I'm not even in the inner circle! I should tone it down a little bit. Hm. I have a feeling my annoyance is acting up again.

Big tests next week before Spring Break. God. I hate studying, thank god I really don't have to study that much. It's only 5 subjects. So much easier when compared too the 10 I used to take back in Malaysia.

I leave you now with this fairly dramatic picture. Because I can.



Ian

This is where I die.

I'm sorry I've been posting alot of poems lately. Have been rather moody about life and future and crap. I'll promise I'll blog sometime later about the Jon McLaughlin Concert. Soon.

This road right here,
So hard and firm,
Is where I will die and bleed and burn.
as I feel the spikes pierce my skin,
As the walls of my heart grow thin.

The flames the envelop me,
In a ring of death,
where fiery imps, elephants and juxtaposes,
dance as they would at a fair,
around and around they go,
as my skin scorches so.

Why'd you leave me here to die?
You ran so quick,
in a blink of an eye.
"I have to go, I can't stay here,

You're a lost cause, my dear."

After I tried,
So bloody hard,
To make you feel better,
You and your broken heart.

I guess it makes sense,
That you do not even care,
It makes sense that words so hurtful,
causes me so much despair.
It makes sense that your arrogance,

is parallel to your incompetance.

I shall die now,

In hatred and distraught,

thinking of you, my love,

and my souls is taken,

from this spot.

Ian

I'm sorry I haven't been posting. I will, soon.

Where are you?

I'll wait by this window everyday,
and watch the flowers grow;
and watch the vines climb higher and higher,
as they kiss my window sill.

I'll wait and feel the summers breeze,
rubbing against my cheeks,
for a thousand years, it wouldn't matter,
I'd wait and wait and wait.

I'll wait and brace through the storms,
the snowfall and the dawns,
and watch flowers die and bloom,
as I wait here in my room.

It could be a month, a year, a century,
but I wouldn't care,
for your arrival is all that fills my heart,
and eliminates my despair.

Where are you?
My Love,
I'll wait for you here.
I'll wait for you through thick and thin,
until you appear.

I'll wait by this window everyday,
as history repeats,
death, life and everything,
they mean nothing to me.



Ian

Goodbye, Malaysia.

It's 3 a.m. now, sharp, and chances are I won't have time to post before I leave tomorrow.

For those who have been asking again and again, I'm leaving at 2:30 to Singapore but I'll be entering the waiting area by myself at 1:30.

That's the worse part about all of this, you know. Being given the gigantic responsibility of holding on to an explicitly large amount of money to be used for the next few months in some foreign country. I'm scared, like seriously freaked out right now. I can't believe in a few days I'll finally be in the US after so much planning. (Kudos to my parents who did the most part, I just sat for the exams and picked what I'm going to bring over there.)

I don't want anyone to show up to see me off tomorrow. Mainly because, Natalee isn't going, and that kills me. I mean, If my bestest friend in the world can't make it, why bother? I'd rather it just be me and my family.

I had my last Mc. Donald's Ice Cream with Nat today. It sorta became a ritual of ours to always pick up a chocotopped ice cream on the way to OU or whilst I'm giving her a lift home. It isn't a really old tradition, but a tradition it was. I can't seem to get the idea out of my head, how much I'm going to miss her. She's been the one that has given me a shoulder to cry on, a person to lean on when I'm not at my best, and now, It's time to say goodbye. What's even sadder is the fact that we probably won't even be able to contact one another whilst we are in our own Schools, mainly because of time difference and connectability. I can't say how important you are Nat, but you are, and I hope you know that. I hope tomorrow morning when you come over we get to really say goodbye. I'd hate to not see a smile on your face as I leave Malaysia.

Genna and Nat

Genna. You are by far, the weirdest, most-aggravating person on earth. With your puns and your derogative comments just leave me wanting to kill you everytime. But I love you, so much. It's sad that I won't see you for awhile. Laughing about 18SX content seems to be one of my favourite pastimes with you. I'll never forget the sleepover, thanks for being such a good host.

I just want all of you to know that. No matter what happens, you two are my top priority, then comes the worst crush every and then Wan Ru. Sorry Wan Ru, I dare say that we've grown apart. Although I love you tons, but still, we haven't been that close in a really long while. Though, you're still in my top list of people I'll try my best to keep in contact with.

I somehow feel detached now. Like theres a plug on my heart that has been just plucked out. It's really nausiating. It's like I want to cry, but can't. I want to die, but can't. I can't do anything! I'm just so human. Unlike some people who just break promise after promise.


Nat's apparently not coming for my farewell because of her mother that wants her to head to Genting Highlands. But I swear If she's lying to me, and made me tear for no reason whatsoever, I'll choke her to death at KLIA. =( I love you Nat!

Chinese New Year Lanterns.


Looks like I won't be getting any Ang Paus during chinese New Year. Sad thing, that.
Though I've recieved alot of money from relatives and friends. I thank you, for all the generous wishing of luck and early ang paus, it's very much appreciated. Especially my cousins that have made me feel so happy that I have people like that who care so much. I love you guys.


Especially my Cousin In Law :)


Credits to EePing.

I'm leaving you all behind, and I hope you all will remember me, as I'll remember all of you. Well, most.

A day may pass; Two; Three,
But Understand what I wish for thee,
I pray for happiness, Joy and goodwill,
To all my friends, you know the drill.
May our paths and sinews once again intertwine,
and we can once again toast to the good times.



Ian